Nike Shows Off Stripey New Cristiano Ronaldo Boots

Another season, another new version of Nike’s Mercurial Vapors that are tailor-made for Cristiano Ronaldo in the latest rendition of the CR7 Safari series. The new boot comes in a distinctive Silver/Solar Red (hot pink)/Obsidian colorway and the designer looks to have never heard of symmetry. The design is cut in half across the boot with one half being a subtle pinstripe and the other being thicker dark grey and “solar red” bars.

There’s no use in talking about what side of the boot the graphics are on in terms of outside or instep because they’re on the same side no matter what foot it’s on. Weird.

These bad boys will cost you $399 when they hit the shops so you know what that means: time to start begging the parents for that stocking stuffer you always wanted.